tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7745081.post369543763212921574..comments2023-10-25T12:01:08.734-04:00Comments on A Political Season: Its Way Past Official: We Have Lost Our MindsPolitical Seasonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09609253738367441591noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7745081.post-91948377958138865982007-11-25T03:33:00.000-05:002007-11-25T03:33:00.000-05:00wow. this one i did NOT hear about. i think it's l...wow. this one i did NOT hear about. <BR/><BR/>i think it's love that's missing. these girls were not loved by the people who should have nurtured them.<BR/><BR/>i believe children are a direct reflection of the parenting styles used to rear them. regardless of how we THINK we are raising our <BR/><BR/>children, the truth is in the proof: their actions when they are away from home.<BR/><BR/>some of our children are filled with anger and rage and this gang fight is a clear example. i don't believe a young woman who is happy with <BR/><BR/>her life would willingly participate in such an activity.<BR/><BR/>i'm not trying to point the finger at anyone. however, as parents we have a responsibility to keep our children as healthy and as safe as <BR/><BR/>we can. that includes mental health.<BR/><BR/>and i know we can only do better when we know better (thank you Ms. Maya Angelou for sharing that profound statement with us.) but who will <BR/><BR/>love and nurture our children if we don't? not because we don't want to, but because we don't know how. the concensus among people i know <BR/><BR/>seems to be that they are raising their children pretty much as they were raised. for most of them, that included what is now considered <BR/><BR/>child abuse. i thank God every day that my momma wasn't that type. <BR/><BR/>in our house, belts held up pants, shoes went on feet, and hands were used for any number of things but never slapping. and i can't speak <BR/><BR/>for how other girls my age did things, but my girlfriends and i never engaged in physical altercations or called each other degrading <BR/><BR/>names.<BR/><BR/>my daughter's experience has been different. let me share...<BR/><BR/>in our efforts to make new friends in our new hometown, my daughter and i have met a LOT of people in the few years we've been here. <BR/>we've met folks hither and yon: at the library, at church, while doing laundry, while shopping, at the recreation center, etc. while we <BR/><BR/>have been blessed to meet a few wonderful folk, we have also come across some humdingers (as my momma would say).<BR/><BR/>the first times we hung out with the wolves in sheep's clothing, things went well. in subsequent get-togethers i noticed aggressive and/or <BR/><BR/>violent behavior in some of these girls. a few incidents happened during extended (and parentless) visits at our home.<BR/><BR/>what i've seen has been both scary and sad.<BR/><BR/>i've witnessed subtle intimidation, verbal threats, and attempted ridicule. i've also seen pushing/shoving, slapping, and attempted <BR/><BR/>choking. needless to say, the perpertrators of these acts are no longer in our play date rotation. however, one of the girls goes to our <BR/><BR/>church so my daughter still interacts with her. ;-(<BR/><BR/>i saw one girl push my daughter in an attempt to trip her. when i told the child that we don't do things like that at our house and i don't <BR/><BR/>allow anyone to do those kinds of things to my daughter, the girl got mad at ME.<BR/><BR/>what role does socio-economic status play? <BR/><BR/>i'm not sure. our old neighborhood (back home) was considered "the hood". here we live in a fairly affluent area. i never had any problems <BR/><BR/>with my daughter's friends back home (even the ones we thought of as sassy) and i wish i could say that about most of the girls we've met <BR/><BR/>here. <BR/><BR/>i don't know, either, exactly how age factors in. (obviously) my daughter was younger before we moved here but she has always had friends <BR/><BR/>in a wide age range. i have noticed that the girls who act out negatively towards my daughter have been her age to a few years older, but <BR/><BR/>i'm not sure of the reasons.<BR/><BR/>i've also noticed that the negatively aggressive/violent girls seem to have a need to bolster self-image by bragging about the ownership <BR/><BR/>and/or future acquisition of designer/luxury items. in a few cases it's been the mothers who have done the bragging.<BR/><BR/>i believe we have to heal ourselves before we can heal our children. but how long is it gonna take for some of us to become aware that we need help?Blisshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09186476021758334398noreply@blogger.com